Rewire Memories for Success

https://www.themuse.com/advice/how-to-rewire-your-brain-to-become-more-successful

Universal Consciousness

The ideas in the videos are both complex yet simple to understand. Essentially, Hagelin proposes the idea that the Unified Field, which Einstein spent most of his life working on, the thing that connects quantum mechanics with the laws of relativity, is consciousness.

In other words, he flips the conventional view that because we have a bunch of neurons and chemicals in our brain, we have consciousness. Instead, at the core, the universe is just an ocean of consciousness and wherever there are high concentrations of consciousness is where we see physical matter.

What a mind bending idea.

Top 10 Keys to Being a Boss

Want more success and happiness? This is how I'll get it based on my personal strengths, weaknesses, and experiences. Yours may differ.

1. Presence - Being in the moment. Can be described as where you place your attention. I tend to get stuck inside my head and thus fail to be present. The best way to become present is to move attention away from your thoughts and onto something else such as the physical sensation in your toes (or other body parts), the sounds around you, listening intently to whoever you're speaking with, and focusing on their eyes. Yoga helps quite a bit (it forces you to bring your attention to your body, breath, and gaze). These are things that help me. Would love to hear anything else you use to become more present.

2. Honest expression of your feelings and boundaries - In the long run, not expressing yourself, boundaries, and feelings will lead to wasting time on people, places, and projects that get you no where. Being dishonest is also inefficient. Better to clear things up from the get go and save yourself bullshit in the long run. If you tend to be uber direct or critical like me, learn a little tact. It'll be more efficient and give you a little more power dealing with peoples' feelings.

3. Leading and dominance - Take control over your life, conversations, and interactions. Few people want to step up and just seek permission. Someone has to be a leader, might as well be you. If you're a female, be assertive but remember that being feminine is still sexy and powerful. Domineering women can be a turn-off and actually lead to less influence in your interactions.

4. Strong non-verbal communication - This is extremely powerful. Hold solid eye-contact, take up some space (but not too much as that shows overcompensation and too much aggression), stand up straight, slow down movements and speech, and speak with a resonant voice from your natural pitch (use hum test to find it).

5. Know your value - Write down and remind yourself of all of the things that make you awesome. When speaking with others, imagine they are the lucky ones for knowing a guy/girl like you. Try to write down 50 things right now!

6. Be the buyer and think win/win. When you meet others, don't sell yourself. Have them sell themselves to you. You're the buyer here. You don't have to sell yourself to anyone. Then, make sure to go 50/50 partners in crime. You both have something to offer. Think win/win mentalities.

7. Nonchalance - Have a casual attitude when meeting new people and making plans. Don't be too eager or needy, you have more important priorities than new people. Additionally, don't over explain yourself. Say and do less and others will begin reacting to you.

8. Play - Don't forget to laugh, tease, and flirt with everyone. Have fun, even in tough situations. Think of Tony Stark in Ironman, always making jokes in the most life threatening situations.

9. Purpose - Follow your life purpose at all times in all actions. Don't know what it is? Figure it out ASAP. Without direction or goals, you're wasting your time on this planet.

10. Gratitude - Express gratitude daily. Write down 3 new things you are grateful for at the end of every day.

Bonus:

11. Always be growing - Never stop learning or investing in yourself whether it's through classes, clothes, health, reading, etc.

7 Important Ideas Summarized

I have 7 posts in the queue that I've been wanting to write. But my interest in spending time at a computer rather than in the real world is waning so I'm just going to format it all into a random summary list. Here goes:

1. Why I'm Into Clothes: I like fashion because a) I love art, but I suck at most art forms like drawing or singing, and b) it has practical, real world applications. There is power and influence in clothing.

2. A Brief Primer on Economics: Most people need to take a basic economics class or two before they argue for idiotic policies. Two important concepts people don't understand are comparative advantage and long-term economic growth.

Comparative advantage basically means strengths, weaknesses, and efficiency. China has a comparative advantage (is better) in manufacturing textiles than the U.S. making 'buy American' programs a stupid idea. The U.S. has a comparative advantage in innovation. Thus, any resources spent on manufacturing in the U.S. is a waste because those resources can be used to contribute a larger benefit to society if spent on what the U.S. is good at (has a comparative advantage in).

The next concept is long-term economic growth. Examining economic growth for the past 50, 1000, even 10000 years we see that the trend is constant growth with occasional minor dips. Yet, there is always a fear that there aren't enough jobs, that certain jobs need to be saved, etc. For example, car manufacturing jobs are dying, but people want to save them, citing their importance to the economy. This is a false belief. Saving obsolete jobs only slows growth. There are always new jobs and services that replace the old jobs once resources are freed.

Obama messed up when he bailed out the U.S. auto industry. We shouldn't keep people employed in manufacturing just because they have no other skills. The money would have been better spent on programs to train new skills into these workers, ones which are relevant to growing industries. For example, Dilma Rousseff, the president of Brazil, implemented scholarship programs for the information/technology field.

Jobs will die out, but there will always be new jobs to replace them. The key is to stay relevant and keep training new skills.

3. Technology and the Death of Personal Integrity: Technology such as texting kills personal integrity because it removes the accountability of ones' word. It's too easy to say yes to a text  or confirm a Facebook event and not follow through for whatever reason. If you want a commitment from someone (other than your few best friends), it must be done in person or over the phone. This places greater accountability on both parties to follow through. It's also more personal, so people feel as if you genuinely want to see them rather than seek their approval.

4. The Hallmark of Genius: Is the ability to hold and understand two opposing ideas at the same time. Almost everything in life is a paradox, and it is valid.

5. Power of Imagination: Imagination is more important than knowledge. Almost every important revolution, theory, or idea arose from someone's imagination first, and then was followed by evidence.

6. The Disease of More: Lots of Western nations seem to be working on providing people with more. We don't need more. We need better quality. For example, we don't need genetic scientists working on creating larger tomatoes. We need better tomatoes; fresh and grown in nutrient rich soil. Americans already throw away 40% of their food (supposedly). Not positive on the statistic but we throw away a lot as it is.

7. Happiness for Productivity - A Great Workplace:

How to Give Advice

...don't.

Everyone feels the need to fix problems. Especially me, since I'm naturally love solving problems and am quite direct. However, few people actually want advice when they talk about their problems. More often than not they just want someone to listen.

The best way to do this is hold eye-contact and paraphrase back what someone has told you. Make 'mmhm' sounds on occasion (but not too frequently). Try cocking your head to the side as well (lead the body and the mind will follow).

There have been too many times when someone has even asked me for advice only to hear me say it and still feel indecisive and need further validation. STFU and go try it or don't ask me for advice. This annoys me to death.

The best method here is inception. Or, as some may call it, the Socratic method.

Whenever someone asks for your advice, just pose the question back to them. Dig deeper by turning whatever advice you'd originally give into the form of a question. For example, if you would tell someone, "try waiting a few days and then go call them and talk about it then," instead say, "What if you waited a few days and then called them?"

Asking someone a question fires up the brain and forces them to think more critically. Most of the time we want to answer our own questions. And, we usually have the best answer anyone could give. It just requires a little push to dig in different directions.

Michaelangelo Your Life

Sand art astounds me. I love the skill and creativity behind it. In fact, I appreciate all kinds of art. In particular, sculpture is a fantastic art form. Creating something wonderful out of a large block of stone catches my interest.

The single most important realization I've come to in my 24 years on this planet is that we create our own realities. This happens through our own biases, perceptions, and beliefs. Our minds cannot process all of the information we receive, so our brain chooses between pieces of information.

Thus, if we decide what to believe, we effectively become master sculptors of our own realities. However, this requires a strong internal locus of control. Many people lack this and believe they are at the mercy of external circumstance.

While many natural laws and external factors do affect our lives, it is more healthy to believe that we ultimately have more control than not. We are inherently repelled by people who complain and adopt the woe-is-me mentalities (unless we do the same, in which case we may draw those people into our lives).

While I cannot say that I believe the law of attraction actually changes physical reality, it is an unnecessary claim because we can change our realities simply by changing our perceptions.

Try this quick exercise with me. Take a moment and look around you and notice all of the things which are blue. Go ahead, take a few moments right now. I'll wait.

...now, can you tell what was red?

Probably not (unless the guy in front of you is wearing a red shirt). This is because our reticular activating system directs our attention (which I also describe as presence or awareness) toward one thing or another rather than trying to soak in all information and then filter it.

As a result, our attention becomes one of the most influencing forces in our lives. We can either wire or brains to focus on the positive or the negative. Habitual use then strengthens these circuits. Thus, changing our brain structures changes our realities.

Our behaviors come from our brains circuits, but behavior also changes our brain circuits. It's a loop phenomena.

Realize that you are the Michelangelo of your own life. You have the power to sculpt your own reality.

A Favorite Poem: If by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you   

    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,   

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

    But make allowance for their doubting too;   

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;   

    If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;   

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

    And treat those two impostors just the same;   

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

    And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

    To serve your turn long after they are gone,   

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

    Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,   

    Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

    If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,   

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,   

    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

The Intersection of High Assertiveness and High Cooperation

I've been pondering how to describe "higher consciousness." What do I mean when I say that humans need to learn how to operate from a higher consciousness?

Well, I stumbled on this chart a few days ago and believe it matches my thinking very well. All lower consciousness thinking falls into the categories labeled anything but "collaborating."

Win/lose or lose/lose mentalities pervade these quadrants. Most people, ideas, and paragdigms fall into these categories. Capitalism falls here as well (competing). Socialism would probably fall near the avoidant mindset though it attempts to masquerade near the top right.

Very few people are true "collaborators." Well, in order for the collective human spirit to reach a higher level of existence, we must work to move the tipping point over so that the majority of people operate from the collaborative paradigm.

Win/win mentalities must become the norm of the world if we are to survive for millions more years. There are many ways to tackle this problem. I'll present them in upcoming articles.

What Is The Purpose of Life?

Being a nerd philosopher, this is a question I have discussed and explored quite a bit. It's difficult for me to describe my thinking process here as I've collected snippets of information for my mental model from all over (physics experiments, spiritual studies, philosophical studies, personal experiences, yoga/meditation, etc.)

The answer is fairly simple. But first, a rebuttal to a few common beliefs. I'm not discussing individual purpose, but the purpose of human life in general.

'There is no purpose to life. We define our own purpose.' This is hard to believe because if there is no purpose to life, the parsimonious solution would be for nothing to exist. Yet, the universe exists. Why is there something instead of nothing?

'The purpose of life is survival.' This does not make sense either. Survival is not a purpose, it is a prerequisite. Why would so much energy go into creating the universe and life for it to remain in a static state of just trying to survive. Once again, the parsimonious solution would be for nothing to exist in the first place.

The purpose of life is simply to experience, to create, to grow. Life is simply the universe trying to experience itself in human form. It is the universe at play. It is the universe creating and building complex objects, like a Lego set. And because we are part of the universe, it is impossible for humans to not create or not to grow ourselves. 

Humanity has not remained a static hunter gatherer society. We've built cities, nations, and technologies. We cannot not create or expand our civilization. This is a fundamental law of the universe. Complexity and growth is inevitable. This is the nature of the universal consciousness. 

Looks Don't Matter: How to REALLY Be Attractive

Finally, I have a cited work for you to refer to. Also, the title is a bit of a lie because...

"Looks" in terms of attraction is a misnomer. We use it to refer to stable measures such as jawlines. But, we forget to include things like grooming.

A study published in 1997 in the journal of Current Psychology demonstrates that physical appearance (as defined by traditional sensibilities) is not the single most important determinant of attractiveness.

The best way to describe the findings is, "You don't need to be good-looking, but you should look good."

The study found that the most important element of attractiveness (for both men and women) was 'self-care.' This included changeable aspects such as neat hair, proper grooming, well-fitting and quality clothing, healthy weight, and good posture. All of which are relatively easy to handle.

Left: how most US men mess up fit. Right: proper fit

After 'self-care,' three other components were important for attractiveness, but only 33% as important as 'self-care.' These were 'masculinity,' 'femininity,' and 'pleasantness.'

Masculinity, somewhat attractive to women, was defined by more stable features (depending on gym time) such as muscularity, shoulder width, larger chest, and bigger jaw. However, these can also be changed.

Femininity, somewhat attractive to men, was defined by longer hair, wearing make-up, and feminine body language and posture. Again, these are changeable.

Pleasantness, somewhat attractive to both men and women, was defined by happy, positive, and friendly attitude. These traits can be cultivated. Smiles are simple and take little effort.

Thus, increasing attractiveness is mostly a matter of changing easily-changeable qualities (see below). On top of that, add the gym for men, long hair and make-up for women, and a positive attitude for both, and you can have the whole package.

I'd also add gym for women as well, as that plays a role in healthy weight and can improve posture.

So, here's how to maximize attractiveness. Remember, self-care is the most important element followed by masculinity/femininity and pleasantness in equal proportion.

1. Grooming - Most important aspect according to the research. Shower, style and keep hair neat, and shower or trim where needed. Brush teeth and keep your breath fresh. Simple, yet so many people fail in this regard.

A note: if you have perpetually bad breath despite cleaning your mouth 1-2x a day, you may need to clean your tongue in addition. Or, you may need dental work. Go see a dentist.

2. Clothing - Also really important and easy to fix. The research indicates three aspects to be more attractive: neat, well-fitting, and more formal. So, make sure to clean and press your clothing, buy clothing that flatters your body shape, and er a little on the classy side.

Read my posts on fashion archetypes and red and black clothes if you want to step it up even further.

3. Posture - stand up straight, head up, and shoulders back. Heels for women and heeled shoes for men improve posture (and they're more formal)! Your desk chair will influence posture as well. Also, working out in the gym and doing certain exercises can affect posture as well.

4. Attitude - Be positive and friendly and make sure to smile frequently.

5. Fitness - A general healthy weight was found to be attractive. This is a bit more difficult for many people who live in a developed nation. Neither too skinny nor too fat is attractive. Exercise and diet are key for maintaining this aspect.

A note: you cannot go on a diet and expect this to change. You have to change your "lifestyle" and the way you eat and move permanently, not for 30 or 90 days.

6. Gender - Step it up further by looking more masculine or feminine (depending on who you want to attract). For men, this will require extra gym time/lifting to move beyond "healthy weight" and develop broader shoulders, a bigger chest, and more musculature. Facial hair can strengthen a weak jawline.

For women, grow out your hair and learn to apply make-up properly to accentuate eyes, lips, and facial structure.

A note: Research shows that masculine women are attracted to very masculine men while really feminine women are attracted to men who may be be less masculine. This does not mean they are attracted to men who dress flamboyantly, have effeminate body language, and are indecisive. It just means they don't need a man to be on the very edge of super masculinity.

(Update) Research also shows that really masculine men prefer really feminine women. Make-up is preferential depending on the man, but long(er) hair is definitely important whether a man says he likes short vs. long hair. Avoid super short hair at all costs. This is a HUGE turn off:

We do not want to date a 12 year old boy. I was honestly really attracted to these two women before they cut their hair. Now I'm really put off. Don't make the mistake of thinking femininity somehow makes you unequal. Use it as a charming tool of positive influence. 

A few caveats: Keep in mind that this study was done by having people look at photos, so attractiveness can easily change when you begin interacting with people in person. Non-verbal communication and personality play a huge factor in attractiveness as well. More on that in the future.

Also, this is a self-reported survey. Behavior may vary from self-reports. Nonetheless, people instinctively have gut reactions for attractiveness.